Monday, November 17, 2008

Middle-Aged Mom Means Well

The friend in my life I've known the longest (since kindergarten), Cary Campbell Umhau, has a wonderful piece in today's Washington Post on being the mother of socially conscious kids. I loved it so much, I thought you should see it, too.

Here's one of my favorite parts:

"One of my children presented me with a handy Pocket Seafood Selector from Oceans Alive that would help me determine which eco-friendly fish I should buy in restaurants or at the grocery store. I truly want to buy fish that are not farmed, that are not caught by methods that kill seabirds, and that are not endangered -- all while being sure to get enough omega-3's. Yet I would need a PhD to decipher the chart on sustainability, and without my reading glasses, I can't handle the fine print." 
There are others...

Friday, November 14, 2008

Entering the New Age of Reason

It's not for nothing that Anne Enright won Britain's most prestigious literary prize last year for her novel The Gathering. Although it's about an Irish family and the reverberations in one sibling's life from the molestation, alcoholism, and, ultimately, suicide of one of her brothers, like all good books, its words extend far beyond their slim 5-inch by 9-inch frame. One line, though I can't find it now despite giving up a entire morning to do so, basically says that money doesn't change people; it just allows them to be who they really are. But I've been wondering in the midst of what is politely called our "economic downturn" if the opposite isn't true. Each time we have to make a decision on how to spend our limited resources, we are making a tiny declaration about what matters most to us. If you can afford to go skiing in Aspen one weekend and to St. Bart's the next, you never have to come down squarely in any camp.

There's one scene in particular that makes the point about the limitations of spending power. Veronica Hegarty, the protagonist, goes into a Dublin department store and realizes that because money is no object, every object holds the same value for her: 

"There is nothing here that I can not buy. I can buy bedlinen, or I can buy a bed. I can buy posh jeans for the girls or a Miu Miu jacket for myself if it doesn't look too boxy. I can buy the plastic Branbantia storage jars that I am now staring at on the third floor..."

Nothing means anything because the one thing she can't buy, of course, is her brother's return. 

I'm not talking in this post about people who have to make untenable choices between buying their blood-pressure pills, say, or buying breakfast. Nor does this observation include those who have lost their jobs or their savings, have nothing to tide them over, and no real prospects for recovery. And this is not a time to be smug, because it feels like that could happen to any of us at any time.

But for most of us, the daily calculus over how to spend our money--whether to get a babysitter for this Wednesday in order to attend a lecture or to save the babysitter up for a weekend night out for a dinner with close friends--is bracingly clarifying. For most of us, these either/or decisions aren't new; they've just come into sharper focus with the economic news of the past few months. The difference is that we no longer have to apologize for denying our kids a Wii or a Princess Barbie. We don't have to apologize for telling our friends that we can go out for a burger but not for a steak. It's as though we have suddenly entering a new Age of Reasonableness, personified by the calm demeanor of our president-elect. Suddenly, values are in vogue. 

Even the very rich who really are different from you and me are trying to act somewhat like the rest of us. A piece in yesterday's New York Times's "SundayStyles" talks about how even for people not particularly affected by the plummeting stock market and the shrinking job market, being in the market for anything conspicuous, be it watches, cars, or fancy vacations, is in bad taste these days. 

"It's now chic to cut back," [says Alexandra Lebenthal, president of a wealth management firm]. "If you ask people if they are going away for the holidays, they say, 'No, we're just spending a very quiet holiday with family'--instead of 'We're going to Anguilla for Thanksgiving.' "

The thing is, spending time with the people we love is what has mattered all along. Everything else is just a distraction.
 

Monday, November 10, 2008

HuffPost Publishes My Three-Mornings-After Election Day Post

HuffPost published my post on the similarities between a second marriage and the election of Barack Obama in his first few days as president-elect called "Obama's Election is the 'Triumph of Hope.'" Please take a look, and let me know what you think. You can comment either here or there.

Thanks so much for being a reader! And thanks to the people at Huffington Post.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

The New Yorker Spotlights Friends Talking in the Night Blog


Following Obama's announcement last night that his daughters, Malia and Sasha, will get to take a puppy with them to the White House, The New Yorker quoted me today in my capacity as White House pet historian. Take a look. And if you have any thoughts about what to name the new first pup, feel free to leave a comment here.

Thank you so much, New Yorker! 

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

My HuffPost Election Day Post

HuffPost published my post on my bizarre immersion in all things George W. Bush just as we're about to get a new president. Please take a look. And please leave a comment either there or here.

BE SURE TO VOTE TODAY!

Monday, November 3, 2008

Thinking Inside the Bun

"The real source of all growth is human ingenuity..."

I don't usually go around quoting Forbes (nor do I usually read it). But when a recent issue was brought to my attention, I had to take note of the above quotation, because suddenly, as if this economically down time has called for people to reassess, I'm seeing/hearing the same idea everywhere about how creativity is THE ingredient that makes someone successful. It's a little different from the well-worn statement "Think Outside the Box"--or Taco Bell's twist, "Think Outside the Bun"--because it's not so much an exhortation as an explanation of what works.

All these thoughts came together on my dinner plate a few weeks ago, when Ralph took the family to Ray's Hell-Burger in Arlington, Va., for dinner. Just when I thought I had reached the apotheosis of hamburger-dom with the foothold gained by Five Guys in our part of the country, along came Ray (his real name is Michael Landrum), who doesn't have a line down the sidewalk outside his burger establishment at both lunch and dinner because he's thinking outside the bun, it's because he's thinking inside of it--only better. Comparing what he's done to the humble hamburger is like comparing a Bugatti to a VW Bug. They're both cars, but that's where the similarity stops. His freshly ground, hand-trimmed beef on a brioche roll topped with a choice of artisan cheeses, among other primo condiments, was a revelation to me, because I've been having the "everything under the sun has already been done" debate with Ralph for more than a decade vis a vis writing. Ralph's argument: just do it your way and people will come.

As if to prove that Hell-Burger, and therefore, Ralph's rationale, was not a fluke, along came Surfside, another new eatery, this one in Washington's Glover Park neighborhood. What the chef, David Scribner, has opened is not so much a restaurant as a commissary. You mark down your order on a sheet of paper, find your own table, and pick up your meal when the electronic gizmo they hand you lights up. But what you bite into is not cafeteria fare at all. It's fresh Tex-Mex meets Tahiti, with guacamole that arrives in huge chunks and just the right side of spicy. I didn't actually taste the seafood, but I take the Washington Post's food critic, Tom Sietsema's word that it's great. (Only Sam, who wants to start his own food blog, had a complaint, which is that the chips were too salty.) The taller among us were thrilled with the inexpensive prices, the availability of margaritas, the quality, and the fact that we were in by 5:30, out by 6:15, and on to Max's Best Ice Cream for dessert, which though it's been around for awhile, follows the same concept of doing it the same but better: you won't confuse what's in your cone with a scoop of Ede's. 

I hate it when Ralph is right! But as long as he is, I'm wondering if you've come across any examples of the same-old thing turned out-of-this-world? 



 

  






HuffPost's Halloween Treat

Thought you should know that Huffington Post picked up my Halloween post called "Halloween and Celebration Inflation" on Friday. Please take a look and leave a comment, either there--or here.

Thanks so much, HuffPost! It was better than candy (not that I stinted on that, either).